Taking a Leap

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When I was in the 6th grade I remember walking home from school saying "I'm going to be a business woman who yells at people to get this done by 5pm and slams the door."  No idea why I not only wanted to go into business, but also wanted to be mean....clearly I've learned a thing or two over the years (although maybe some of my employees may disagree).  But obviously the idea of running a business and building something I own has run through my veins since birth. 

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After having a family and realizing what really matters in life, my attitude towards work has changed a little.  Some days I long to be a stay at home mom and be able to focus on my kids and potty training, reading to them, playing with them.  But some days - I'm so grateful I get a few hours a day where I get a break and get to work my brain in a different way.  My job is stressful and busy.  It is also flexible and allows me to be home with my kids a couple days a week and allows me to come and go if needed.  Working at home with my kids isn't as great as one would think.  I sometimes feel like a witch of a mom who spends my days on calls and yelling at the kids to run out of the room.  I have longed for a job that I love and want to be doing.  A job that feeds my soul.  If I have to be taken away from my kids physically and emotionally drained each day, shouldn't it be doing something I love?

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But how do you get paid to buy fabric?  Or watch TV?  I've struggled trying to figure that out!  But I love to sew and I have enjoyed quilting.  I bought a Handi Quilter about 6 years ago.  It has been so nice to have so I can complete my projects.  I have loved being able to whip up a quilt for a gift and to be able to complete the whole project - in a night.  I have quilted for a few people.  I have struggled doing this.  I want to give people a good deal.  Before I had a quilting machine I always hated spending big bucks to get my quilts quilted.  I wanted to offer people an affordable price.  But doing that means I had to go with the easy patterns.  Loops, stippling etc that I feel comfortable doing.  I'm not sure what I was thinking buying this machine right as I started a family.  Having a baby and a full time job made it difficult to spend the time I needed to practice my quilting.  Whenever I have time I wanted to sew - or quilt a real quilt.  Not practice on scrap fabric.  I've been discouraged because I haven't been able to put the time and energy behind the quilting that I wanted to and need to, to be successful.

About a year ago I started looking into Gammill machines, and more importantly Statler Stitchers.  I think the guys at the Gammill store must think I'm crazy.  Coming in every few months wasting their time asking questions about the machine, going back and forth on prices etc.  Good news is I finally took the leap.  We bought us a Gammill Statler Stitcher this week.  I am so nervous and excited.  I have butterflies and feel energized.  Isn't it crazy how jumping into a project no matter how scary can feel so freeing if its something you're passionate about? In the next month I'll have my machine and be working away to get familiar with the ins and outs of it.

Stay tuned for announcements - I'm starting up a new business.  I will have Grand Opening specials and giveaways.  I am so excited for this leap we are taking and can't wait to share the details with you all!  Stay tuned!

Fig Tree Obsession

Is it just me or is Fig Tree on a seriously roll right now?  I am loving - LOVING everything they are putting out these days!

It all started with this quilt.

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I love this pattern - you can make the quilt or make a table topper.  Both are on my to do list.  I bought a layer cake of Tapestry to make the quilt and some of those new Candy charm packs things out of Marmalade to make th topper - or the new French General line - and Double Chocolate - and Odds and Ends - maybe I should hand some out as Christmas gifts. 

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The quilting on these new Fig Tree quilts is KILLING me!  Adds so much to the quilt.  So I bought this pattern.

A few weeks later I spotted this.

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I saw it one day - saw a fabric bundle the next day so begged Mike to throw me a bone with some money attached so I could get my fabric fixation.  When I went to order - the kits were gone.  YES GONE!  I died a little.  I ordered the bundle of Christmasy fabrics and put a note with some begging and pleading to put me on the magical list to receive the next shipment of kits.  I went to bed in tears (not really) saying my prayers (this was important) that this kit would manifest itself and become available.  I was going through a serious withdrawl.  The thought of not owning this kit was giving me anxiety.  (I realize this is fabric, but I'm sure you all have felt this same way before).  Luckily Mr Eric Fig Tree himself gave me a call with the good news that they did in fact have a kit they could send me.  My prayers were answered, my fix was met.  Life could go on. 

Then I saw this pattern

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Ok technically I had seen it in the Halloween quilt - because it is the same pattern, but so many options?  I was already receiving the pattern with the Halloween kit - so I decided to just add a jelly roll of Tapestry into the mix.  And of course come spring the Avalon version will also need to be made - I mean how could I not?

I waited a few days for my kits - and was getting worried at this point.  No email stating it had been shipped had come my way.  The withdrawls were starting up again - and I got another call from Mr Fig Tree.  I paid for 2 separate shipping charges, yet they were going to be shipped together.  Would I rather have a pattern sent.  Silly question - of course.

Enter the Milky Way

This pattern - with so many options - again.  Do you go the fireworks patrotic way?

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  The red and taupe can't go wrong way?

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 Or the Christmas red and green way? (I know this picture is cut off, but I can't get it to work right, but you get the idea)

 
All of them?  Again with the quilting on these - AMAZING! 

The funny thing is - and this happens every time.  I don't love the Fig Tree fabrics.  I see them and I'm not overly in love (except for Strawberry Fields - that was true love).  So I never buy the fabric when I first see it.  Then I see quilt after quilt done up in the Fig Tree fabrics and can't help myself.  I have to rush out and get as much as I can to make these dang quilts!  It happened with Butterscotch and Roses, with California Girl, Tapestry, I'm going to get a head start for Avalon - and lets not discuss how much fabric I have out of Strawberry Fields.  I just kept buying and buying that one. 

So there you have it - the Fig Tree obession I never knew I had until recently.  But boy are these quilts on my to do soon list!

The Invisible Mom

My friend Talia sent this over to me in an email this week and couldn't believe what a nerve it hit in me.  Its been a rough few weeks/months trying to balance out life and this rang so true.  I had to share it.

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see
I'm on the phone?' Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible.
The invisible Mom.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this??
Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'  Some days I'm a crystal ball; 'Where's my other sock?, Where's my phone?, What's for dinner?'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history, music and literature -but now, they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England . She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting
there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when she turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and
said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe.I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: 'With admiration for the greatness of what you are building
when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:
1) No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.
2) These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.
3) They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
4) The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A story of legend in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are
you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.
No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, no Cub Scout meeting, no last minute errand is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on.The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a
turkey for 3 hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, he'd say, 'You're gonna love it there...'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible mothers.

Been Busy

I've been very busy this week getting some of my sewing projects done and cleaning out my craft room.  Pictures to come soon!

Positive Thinking

Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day. ~Author Unknown

Lately I have struggled with thinking positive each day. I've been tired, feel fat (and can't give up the coke) have no energy, have screaming kids etc etc. The month of December was a little rough for me. I laid in bed at night wondering if I would ever get my life back. Thinking to myself, "is this how its always going to be? Will I ever have time to do something I want to do? Will Mike and I ever leave our house together, alone again?" I was feeling sorry for myself. I knew having kids your life turns around. I know this means there are these two little people who need me for everything. Its just so hard to hold onto yourself during this process. Over the last month, things have gotten easier and easier, and I am seeing the light each day get a little brighter. Don't get me wrong, I love my children. I love being with them. I have just struggled with loosing myself in the process. I have put things in place to make this better (sewing 5 minutes a day, working out etc). Things are looking up.

When you feel dog tired at night, it may be because you've growled all day long. ~Author Unknown

Reading this post today got me thinking. Make a list of all the positive things in your life and then make a list of all the negative things. For most of us the positive list is so much longer, yet we spend more time thinking about the negative short list.

A person will sometimes devote all his life to the development of one part of his body - the wishbone. ~Robert Frost

I was raised by positive thinkers. My mom always taught me to be positive and believe I could do anything. I remember on days when I would get down she would pull me into her lap (even at 16) and tell me not to feel sorry for myself and to be happy. She was also raised this way by Jiggs my grandpa. He was the King at positive thinking. Because of this up bringing, I have learned to let the negative things in life roll off my back. Things happen in life to bring us all down, but I've learned to brush myself off and get back up. Not to let something (especially if its out of my control) ruin my day.

Life is great. Don't let circumstances and society fool you into believing it's not. ~Adabella Radici

Since having children of my own, I find myself pondering my day. Usually my thoughts bring a smile to my face as I think of something Jake said (how does a 2 year old learn all of these things?) I find myself saying a pray of thanks that we are all healthy and happy for the most part (a little tired, but happy). Here is my current positive list.

- Healthy family
- Happy family
- Mike and I both have jobs
- Nanny Grama
- A home we love
- To live in a location with 4 seasons (can't wait for this one to be over!)
- Smart, well rounded children (I can already tell Sam is smart)
- FABRIC and new fabric

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. ~Robert Brault

What is there to be unhappy about when I have all of those things?

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful. ~Buddha

Simplify

Camille is such an inspiration to me. The mom who has her quilt pattern company, works like mad but has time for her family and fun. Her blog is great and inspiring.

This post in particular has a great quote with a fun picture. (She's also a whiz at photography)